sand sifting through my fingers

on the eve of my dream
and i've got an avalanche of thoughts and emotions
too many things to sort out
and i think of you constantly
i turn towards the heavens
and ask why
did i fall in love in this precise moment
'mother india tests you' - i've been told
and by god is she testing me

yesterday night
i finally plucked up the courage, and
told you how i feel
'though you knew already
but i felt lame
short of enough words.
it was nice to hear you say you feel the same
'though i already knew
we parted ways
i left feeling like you were sand slipping through my fingers
something i cannot grasp
by way of my own decision

however this i owe to myself
this voyage into the unknown
to make matters worse
my travelling-partners-to-be
feel so distant -
i hope against hope
that it's only a wrong impression i've got
and i think of you
and i'll still be thinking
on the way into my venture